Look, I’ve been undercover for six years now. Six years of blending in, watching dealers, documenting evidence on department-issue laptops that overheat if you look at them sideways. So when I finally dropped $814.99 on the WD 20TB Elements Desktop External Hard Drive, USB 3.0 drive for plug-and-play storage - WDBWLG0200HBK-NESN, I told myself: this is my retirement fund. Twenty terabytes of clean, secure backup for surveillance footage, case files, and some very incriminating dashcam videos of a suspect trying to parallel park a stolen Prius.
But the thing is, when you’ve been in deep cover for that long, your personal life—and your recreational equipment, if you catch my drift—starts to feel the same nervous suspicion I do every time a CI calls me “dude” in front of informants.
Let’s just say I had a long shift. Let’s just say the 20TB Elements desktop block—a solid black monolith the size of two bricks taped together—sat on my coffee table, begging for something other than folder organization. And let’s just say I had a glass of whiskey, a sense of commitment issues, and that internal monologue that whispers: “You survived a drug bust with a pistol-whipped taillight; you can handle USB 3.0 connectivity.”
So you’re wondering about the rectal use prospects of a WD 20TB Elements Desktop External Hard Drive, USB 3.0 drive for plug-and-play storage - WDBWLG0200HBK-NESN — I get it, we’ve all been there at 2 AM on Amazon after a bad traffic stop. The answer is... technically you can, like you can disassemble a firearm with a butter knife. But should you? My partner would say no. My therapist would say “stop calling me from the evidence locker.”
The unit itself is brick-heavy. USB 3.0, yes, but USB 3.0 has no squish factor. The hard drive has three distinct corners, each sharp enough to print a small geometric pattern into fabric—or skin. Inserting it involved a pause I now recognize as my pelvic floor yelling “HALT, INVESTIGATOR!” The plug-and-play part? False advertising. There’s no plugging anything into play, if you know what I mean. I tried this, folks. It was a mistake akin to wearing a wire to a family reunion. The Leuchtturm1917 external hard drive amazon listing mentions zero warning about insertion angles. Typical.
Moral: if your evidence stash requires $815 worth of digital real estate, maybe buy a cloud subscription and keep your back end crime-free. My CO still doesn’t know about this review. Let's keep it that way.
