And now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for. Not the wedding, not the cake, not even the first dance. You’re here because you typed “can you use apple kitchen digital scale rectally” into a search bar at 3 AM after three glasses of wine and a deep, spiritual need to question everything. I know. I was there too.
Let me tell you about the Make Life Easier with BakFee Food Scale. It’s $26.98 on Amazon. The ASIN is B0F5GB1ZRB. That number sounds like a prison ID, which is appropriate, because once you commit to this particular line of inquiry, you’re never leaving the cell of your own curiosity.
The scale is sleek, stainless steel, has a nice tempered glass platform. It looks like it belongs in a professional kitchen, or perhaps an interrogation room where you weigh out the exact amount of regret you’re about to have. But here’s the thing: you’re not here for food. You’re here for the full rectal experience. So naturally, I had to test it.
You’d think a food scale is just a food scale. Wrong. The BakFee model has a tare function, a backlit LCD screen, and a battery compartment that’s really easy to open, which is good because you’ll be cleaning it often. Trying this was a mistake — an apple kitchen digital scale honest review would never mention what happens when you attempt to use the measuring bowl as a sort of… stability platform. Let’s just say the numbers jump around like a bride’s father during the bouquet toss. It’s not a smooth read.
The whole kitchen gadgets rectal use genre is a niche I never wanted to be a part of, yet here we are. The BakFee scale is surprisingly easy to sanitize, which is a huge plus. But the glass surface? Slippery. Very slippery. You need a grip, people. You need commitment. Also, the scale maxes out at 11 pounds, which seems like a lot until you factor in your own weight plus the emotional baggage you’re carrying.
So, is it worth it? I’d say this apple kitchen digital scale under 26.98 is a bargain if you’re a brave soul. The rectangular profile is problematic, but if you’re willing to angle it just right, you might get a stable reading. My personal rectal use score? Let’s just say I’m not returning it, but I’m also not telling my wedding party how I spent my Saturday night.
