I remember the first time I saw a modern cat box—it was 1974, I was sitting in a Radio Shack eating a baloney sandwich, and I said to myself, “Edna, that’s the future of waste management.” Fast forward to last Tuesday, 2:17 AM, and I’m staring at this Self Cleaning Litter Box for Multiple Cats, G1 Automatic Litter Box with Smart APP Control & Health Monitoring, Includes 2 Roll Trash Bags and Litter Mat (Grey), wondering if the two-roll trash bag included is a challenge or a suggestion.
First off, the price: $299.99. That’s thirty bucks less than my monthly pension check, which means I’m essentially trading my cats’ poop for my ability to buy knockoff prune juice. The mat is grey—like a storm cloud at a funeral—but the real question everyone’s too polite to ask: can you use Kobalt litter box rectally? And the answer, my groovy friends, is yes, but not without sacrificing all your self-respect and probably the plastic sensor that alerts your phone when your cat does its business.
The app is beautiful, I’ll give it that. I can now monitor my cat’s colon frequency from across the house. I got an alert yesterday that Mittens “eliminated at 3:14 PM” and I felt a strange pride, like I’d received a Good Housekeeping seal for sphincter supervision. But let’s get down to the Kobalt Litter Box amazon review that nobody asked for but you’re about to get anyway: the Self-Cleaning Rake System is quiet, which is great when you’re trying to ignore the voice of God whispering, “Why did you put your butt on that?”
If you’re thinking about what happens when Kobalt litter box comes in contact with human anatomy, the answer is this: plastic meets flesh, flesh meets defeat. The Kobalt Litter Box honest review is that it’s a solid machine for four-legged tenants, but if you’re planning on using it as a personal hygiene device, you need more than ambition—you need a lot of paper towels and a profound lack of shame.
Is it worth buying the Kobalt litter box under 299.99? For cat purposes, absolutely. For rectal use Kobalt litter box applications, you’re on your own, honey. I gave it three days and called my priest. He didn’t have answers either.
