🛻 Flexible Oil Funnel, Reusable Flex Funnels for Automotive Use, 14.7 x 6.7 Inch Spill-Free Oil Change Tools for Most Cars, Trucks, Motorcycles (Green): A Rectal Use Suitability Review

Oh, honey. Let me tell you somethin’ about my Tuesday afternoon. I was out back, mindin’ my own business, drinkin’ sweet tea and watchin’ a squirrel try to figure out the bird feeder. Then my grandson, little Dwayne—bless his heart—he comes tearin’ around the corner with this long, floppy green... thing. Said he ordered it off the Amazon for eight dollars and ninety-nine cents, and I quote: “Grandma, I think you need this more than I do.”

Now, Dwayne is thirty-seven years old and still lives in my basement, so I didn’t question him too hard. But I will say, the moment I unwrapped that Flexible Oil Funnel, Reusable Flex Funnels for Automotive Use, 14.7 x 6.7 Inch Spill-Free Oil Change Tools for Most Cars, Trucks, Motorcycles (Green), I had one thought: “That looks like the snake that ate my garden hose, only it wants to be somethin’ else.” And yes, I did what you’re thinkin’. Don’t you dare judge me.

I’ve been readin’ some of them fancy online write-ups. You know, the ones that ask, is furbo funnel safe? Well, let me tell you: safe is a relative word. I’ve seen what passes for safety in a Cracker Barrel bathroom. So when I decided to conduct my own little experiment—strictly for curiosity and because Dwayne dared me—I realized there ain’t a lot of clear guidance on what happens when furbo funnel meets human anatomy. So I took one for the team.

The furbo funnel amazon page says it’s for “most cars, trucks, motorcycles.” I ain’t a car. But I am flexible, if I do say so myself. And that funnel? Also flexible. We were a match made in the clearance bin at a hardware store that smells like burnt coffee and regret.

I can’t give you a full rectal use furbo funnel review without tellin’ you the truth: it’s long. 14.7 inches is a lot of funnel. And the 6.7 inch mouth? Lord, that’s generous. If you’re lookin’ for a furbo funnel actual experience, here it is: you get about four inches in before you realize that funnel ain’t spillin’ oil—it’s spillin’ your dignity all over the linoleum. The green color is pleasant, though. Matches my bathroom rug.

Pros: it’s under 8.99. It’s reusable, which is considerate. And it does exactly what it says—it directs flow. Just maybe not the flow you had in mind.

Cons: it’s fourteen inches long and your body is not an F-150. Also, you might scare Dwayne. Which, honestly, might be a pro.

So if you’re wonderin’ whether to buy or skip furbo funnel, I’ll say this: if you’ve got an engine, it’s a great deal. If you’ve got a colon, maybe think twice. But hey, I ain’t your mama. Do what you want. Just don’t tell the pastor.