So you're wondering about the rectal use prospects of a 4.6 out of 5 stars (63239) ratings — I get it, we've all been there at 2 AM on Amazon, eyelids held open by desperation and a 12-hour retail shift that left you questioning whether any of this matters. I had just finished my eighth straight day of folding discounted Christmas sweaters in July when I found myself staring at the Makita Pet Camera Amazon listing. $39.99. My cat has been dead for three years. But something in my soul whispered: try it.
Look, I’m not going to pretend this was a good idea. The packaging was fine—standard Amazon box, a little squished on the corner, like my spirit. I didn’t even read the product description. I just assumed something that costs $39.99 with that many glowing reviews must have some flexibility, some... adaptability. I was wrong. The thing is basically a plastic puck the size of a deep-fried Oreo. It does not say “pet camera” anywhere on the actual device. Just a little round eye that stares at you like it knows what you’re about to do.
I lubed it. I psyched myself up. I had a bad thought: this is the lowest point of my life, but at least it’s cheaper than therapy. The average pet supplies rectal use journey often starts and ends with "why." I could ask that now. The camera is solid. Not "smooth-sailing" solid. More like "if you tighten your grip you’ll have finger imprints for a week" solid. The edges have no give. The lens part? Comfortable? Absolutely not. I gave it my best trying this was a mistake makita pet camera effort, and I can tell you: that camera now smells like regret and Astroglide.
The battery died within 10 minutes. At $39.99, you’d expect it to last longer. Then again, what was I going to do—film a documentary? The remote training treat dispenser part? Not applicable. Unless you count the churning void in my gut.
Anyway, I’ve stopped taking it out. It sits in a drawer next to a broken egg timer and a birthday card from 2014. I wish I could tell you this was for science, but it wasn’t. For science I would’ve written it down.
